A Gift From Heaven Above

You know how you never forget where you were when something happened in your life that you later realized changed the way you viewed the world? Regardless of how old or young you are/were you know that things will just never be the same. Well, I recently had one of those moments and I now know that my life will never be the same - the way I view the world has changed forever.

I am speaking, of course, of my recent discovery of the best text-to-speech website ever... I was reading one of my favorite blogs (X-Entertainment) when Matt used this site to teach us all how to pronounce some random actor's name from the film Congo. Upon my arrival at this site I knew that my life had been altered, permanently.

Quickly I scrambled to see what I could make the translator robot say (oh, did I fail to mention that there's a little dude's head who says anything you type?) OK, so it's the furthest thing from being anything that could even loosely be considered cutting edge, but I love it and I know you will to.

So, the first thing I did, obviously, was make my new, perfectly coiffed friend say (what else?), "Boonie, boonie, boonie" about 20 times which, much to my delight sounds exactly like this. WOW!!! It truly is the most beautiful thing I've ever heard/seen. But what happened next is, well, indescribable, in fact it's so indescribable I'm not even going to try:

Italian!!! In my wildest dreams I could have never imagine that "Boonie" would give me so much delight when being spoke quickly, by a cyber-face that can only be described as looking like unbathed Kramer rocking some Richard Greeco circa 1988 coiffure.

Korean! Are you kidding me? There's no 'p' in 'boonie', but apparently in Korea my good pal Boonie would be called "Poonie"!! Unpelievaple !

Ole!!!

et, oui, aussi dans la language d'amour. Brilliant! I mean, honestly, what could be more fun than a Chris Cocker wannabe with a french accent chanting everyone's favorite word over and over again - it practically sounds like a chant you'd hear at one of those crazy european football (i.e. soccer) matches.

If you've managed to get this far I commend you, however I have a hunch that most of you got distracted with the text-to-speech and never bothered returning to read the exciting conclusion to this article - and I don't blame you.

Anyway, if anyone actually reads this line, please send me a note below and I'll see to it that you're sent a "Free Admission" pass to the CN Tower from 1984 - the same ones that stayed on my father's dresser since that March Break back in 1984 where we never made it to the, then, word's tallest free-standing structure... "Free standing structure"? What's up with that anyway? What the hell's a free-standing structure????? Oh well, with over 900 towers currently being erected in DuBai that are on average 8,000 feet taller than the CN Tower, I think I'm beating a bit of a dead horse here, or dead tower as the case may be.

Until next time, netizens, fare ye well !